Livedarkness

The things that Ronald and Evans would say to me on a daily basis would terrify an average human being. Below are snippets from my day.

February 5th, 2025

From Ronald:

“You little bitch. You have to be abused to be okay with what’s done with you.”

“You cherry-pick the part where I praise you.” That’s what he tells me as I record parts of our conversations down.

“Brain, guts, and hands. We will paralyze you. You just need to think that it’s normal – the bit where we abuse you. You also have to make it worth it, for us to pay up – even then it would be a bargain. There’s no proof and you need an inside man.” By this time, Zhang and others who can corroborate my story have been locked up in Division 52 for months.

“My wife is loyal – to a certain extent. She has always been on the other side [the side that takes advantage of others], which makes YOU stronger.” From Ronald’s perspective, getting taken advantage of makes you tougher.

“My wife is a judge. I tell you about my personal life to make me personable. My wife thinks we are Nazis and morally repugnant.” But she doesn’t divorce him.

“Honey, you really do bring out the worst in people. You just have too much. What are you going to do about it? Sue me? Stop writing.” as I start to record things down again, fearing that I might forget as days seem to blur.

February 7th, 2025

From Evans:

When Evans obscured a memory of Zhang driving on the road, in a patrol car, to prevent me from figuring out where Zhang lived, he tells me “You forget anyways.”

There are other things that he would say that terrifies me everyday.

“[Ronald] He tells me not to use it [the technology] on my son because he’s not grown. I think it’s his way of showing concern.”

When Evans makes me weak so I couldn’t keep up with my lab work, he says “You are not counting cells for all your samples, that’s how I know [that you are weak].”

“If that’s how you are going to play it (proceed with a criminal trial)…”, while I felt pressure around my neck, “…meet my wife” he says. Evans does not want legal implications and asks us to reconsider. He tries to soften us with family. When others want to speak, it gets transmitted right into my ear and is on 24/7. Evans has me listening to it for 9 months now.